On being a bicoastal bride

I'm not a numbers person at all, and weddings are all about them. Set a budget. Decide on a guest list. Add many numbers that didn't seem necessary at first. Then alas, break the budget. But for this Type-A crazy girl? My evil number is 2,813.

E.g., the number of miles separating us from our venue/San Francisco.

It's definitely more of a marathon than a sprint. (source)

With the power of technology, getting the nitty-gritty decided is really not that bad. I made a trip to San Francisco early in the summer and used my five senses to truly check out some venues (which we'd already nitpicked at extensively online) and we chatted our photographer's ear off, but in the end, requests were made over the phone, the contract tweaked in e-mails and money exchanged via PDF or snail mail.

When it comes to decorations, photography and all the other inanimate objects, it's fairly easy to make a decision. It's when you get people and events involved that things get a bit foggy.

Greg and I are pretty laid-back people with fairly simple needs. We'd usually opt for a no-frills day together over getting gussied up to sip tea with our pinkies out. I keep in touch with friends across the U.S. thanks to Facebook, Twitter, Gmail, video chat and the good ol' telephone.

So when "bridal shower" and "bachelorette party" come in one ear, all that comes out my other is "airfare."

(source)

Greg moved to D.C. more than three years ago, so we've come to grips that flying to California is a permanent part of our regular budget as long as we're here. We've sacrificed some holidays to save cash, and we're considering ending that dry spell this year. Adding even more trips to the possibly longer holiday itinerary scares me and my credit cards.

I love the fun traditions, and lord knows I miss my California family and friends. But then practical Sharon on my other shoulder wonders if these wedding events can be crammed in with holiday parties, and then I get a headache.

Despite the 17-month engagement (which has now passed the 10-months-out mark!), it doesn't seem like there's enough time for everything.

Then I wonder if my view of "everything" is a little bloated, or that I'm just too cheap to celebrate something that'll only happen once in my life.

Has anyone else dealt with having a long-distance wedding and/or lifestyle? Any advice on my money vs. life-experience debate?